God Doesn't Text!

I have a cell phone. Who doesn't? It’s the one thing I never leave home without and if I do, I will go back home to get it even if it means being late to whatever. But it isn’t just a phone...it’s my complete, personal & professional file cabinet, housing my entire life and all it’s moving parts, as well as the conduit that keeps me as efficient as possible in everything I do: work, communication, kids, calendars, etc. It used to be that phones were just phones...right? A handy little device that allowed us to stay in touch with people; to communicate with our children, husbands, wives, etc. It’s ironic that instead of inspiring connection, it's rapidly becoming the source of isolation and distraction. 

We text INSTEAD of talk. 

We text while in the same room together;  We check Facebook and Twitter to catch up with each other. Most of us would just rather not talk or we don’t have time to talk, so a quick one-liner is more convenient. And not only that, but acronyms are now the popular craze because we don’t even have time to spell it out. LOL! I’m guilty, I do it. I text all the time and I even tell my clients to text me, instead of voicemail, because I don’t always have time to listen to them. Some people have said, “I don’t text...it’s so impersonal”. 

We text AND talk. 

Have you ever done it? Or has someone done it to you? Talking to someone while they are texting on their phone is like talking to a wall. But we still do it. It’s becoming more and more socially acceptable even though I think we’d all agree that it’s just down-right rude. We’re not giving either person our undivided attention, whether it’s the person I’m texting or the person I’m talking to. Some people have the gift of juggling multiple tasks, but no matter how good you are, it’s still rude.

Relationship. Connection. Communication. 

It’s what we all want. It’s what the phone was invented to do and what the cell phone was suppose to promote, right? Yet, is it? Don’t get me wrong, I love my phone, but I’m just observing the possibility of it’s misuse. And as I find myself annoyed with this misuse (my own included), I am inwardly nudged by my Heavenly Father. It’s as if He momentarily allows me trade places with Him and see what He sees:

He created us to have a relationship with Him. He doesn’t want to text, He wants to talk. He wants a relationship with us; He wants to connect with us through His Holy Spirit and communicate with us through His word. What do we do? We replace relationship with religion, His Holy Spirit with “positive thinking & good behavior theories” and then we replace His word with our own will. In a nutshell, we think we can connect with God, because we go to church, think good thoughts, do good things and read the Bible without ever having a relationship or applying His word to our lives. It’s like we’re texting instead of talking or texting while He’s talking. We are so distracted that we miss God's purpose. That’s misuse of Christianity at its best. God wants a relationship. He doesn’t text. He waits for us to call on Him and then He will answer (Jeremiah 33:3).

I have a quote from Mike MacIntosh, (pastor of Horizon Christian Fellowship, San Diego) written in the front of my Bible that reads, "If the life of Christ is not your pattern, then the death of Christ cannot be your pardon". As I look at the life of Christ, I see the relationships He formed with people, the attention He gave to the sick and hurting and the communication He continually had with His Heavenly Father and I have to ask myself, “is this my pattern?”

"Entitlement OR Gratitude?"

Definition of Entitlement: “Having a right to something”; “belief that one is deserving of or entitled to certain privileges."

Definition of a Gift: "A thing freely & willingly given without payment in return."

As Americans we commonly hear about freedom and rights. We speak of them loosely, and I assume we’re all grateful for them. But, as I really listen to people talk about these freedoms and rights, I begin to hear a common attitude of entitlement and I find it enlightening that our rights often contradict our freedom and trap us.

Here’s a few examples:

Freedom of speech, yet the right to remain silent. 

Freedom of life, yet the right to end the life of an unborn child. 

Freedom to marry whomever we want, yet the right to divorce. 

Freedom to pursue dreams, yet the right to reject anothers. 

Freedom to listen, yet the right to ignore.

Freedom to love, yet the right to fight. 

There’s a back door in our “freedom’s”, with “RIGHTS” as our EXIT sign. I get it, though. It really just depends on which side we sit on. If we want to speak, then we claim freedom. If we want silence, then we claim rights. But it’s a trap if you’re not on the right side. If, for example, you are the one who wants to talk, yet someone else wants silence, how ever will there be freedom?

Being an American, I live the logic of this everyday and even take part in it.

But being a Christian, I am handed a different set of lenses, in which to see, and I am held responsible to respond as a child of God. 

Here’s the difference....

I have the freedom to speak, but are my words edifying? 

I have the right to silence, but am I being honest? 

I have the freedom to live, but am I living for me or God? 

I have the right to choose, but whose life is it?

I have the freedom to marry who I want, but is it who God wants for me? 

I have the right to divorce, but is it biblically justifiable?

I have the freedom to pursue my dreams, but is it rooted in selfish ambition? 

I have the right to reject others dreams, but am I being prideful or envious?

I have freedom to listen, but am I really caring about what I hear? 

I have the right to ignore, but am I hurting someone else by doing so?

I have the freedom to love, but am I trying to be loved first? 

I have the right to fight, but am I fighting for what’s right?

I guess what it boils down to is our sense of entitlement or our gratitude. Most of us believe we are entitled or deserving of something. But do we really have the right to say what our rights are or what we deserve or don’t deserve?  

As a child of God, I’ve chosen to surrender my life (rights & all) and let God be my Lord and Savior. I believe that He can do a much better job with my life than I ever could (Ephesians 3:20 “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us”). Because of this, I handed over my rights to Him...with no backdoor. He is in the driver’s seat and I trust Him, completely. Everything I am and have is because of God’s love, mercy and grace, (John 15:5 “apart from Him I can do nothing”). 

The real freedom that only He offers, is truly a GIFT, in which I am eternally grateful. Dare I say I deserve it?

"Stop Asking So Many Questions!"

As a mother of 2 little girls, 9 & 11, I find myself answering many questions about so many things. “What? When? Why? How?” It can be exhausting. I’ll plan out a day, a week or an occasion, such as a trip or vacation and give them a general idea of what it is and then it will happen....all the questions. They want all the details up front. I just want to say to them.. “stop asking so many questions, you don’t need to know everything!”

Sometimes, I will give them the details. But more often than not, I don’t. I may want to surprise them or maybe I want them to just trust me with the details. Sometimes I simply need to omit the details because they wouldn’t understand them and an explanation is tiresome and unnecessary.

We all probably did this as children, because that’s what kids do, right? We were just innocently curious and we thought we needed to know everything. But it didn’t stop at childhood. We still do it as adults. Just recently my wonderful husband, Aaron shared with me some information about a simple decision he made and I started asking him a bunch of questions. He didn’t like the interrogation and expressed how my questions made a statement of distrust. I didn’t think it did, I just thought I was being “innocently curious”. But it sunk in. Why did I need more information? I trust my husband so much, but that wasn’t the message I was sending him. I held my tongue and began to process this in my own head. Then, it hit me and I got it. God spoke to me in that ever-so-gentle & quiet, Fatherly way. “My child, stop asking so many questions, you don’t need to know everything”.

That was a moment of deep personal inventory. All too often, I want to know the “why’s, when’s or how’s” in the details of my life’s circumstances, whether simple or complex, painful or exciting. But my heavenly Father already has His plan for me and maybe He omits some of the details, because He knows I won’t understand them and He just wants me to trust Him. He sees what I can’t. He puts the pieces together with the finished picture in mind and all I can see are the individual pieces and they don’t make any sense all by themselves.

The “need to know” is a “need for control”. Do I want control of my life or do I want God to have control? Sometimes He will reveal to us some of the details. But more often than not, He doesn’t. And just like I want my children to trust me, even more so God wants me, His daughter, to trust Him. If I’m asking too many questions, then I’m not trusting, am I?

So, “stop asking so many questions, you don’t need to know everything!”

Job 38:4 And God said “Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth?”

What's So Amazing About Grace?

It doesn’t seem that long ago when I was a kid in church half-heartedly paying attention to the sermons. My sister and I would restlessly entertain ourselves in the pews while everyone else sat seriously still. I remember one time, during communion, we started playing with the crackers and giggling under our breath, feeling no shame for that holy moment. It was my sister that was the instigator of most of our mischief. I would hop on board, with her as captain, and then I’d instantly start worrying about getting into trouble, while she blissfully enjoyed the ride of rebellion. 

I would test the boundaries, like all children do, but I always felt a heavy sense of conviction afterwards. I just had more moments of seriousness, than whimsical freedom. I wanted a deeper understanding of spiritual things and of God. I liked church. I enjoyed the worship songs and listening to my mom & dad sing favorites like “Amazing Grace” and “That Old Rugged Cross”. But I never paid much attention to the words, as much as how it made me feel.  I would often wonder, “what’s so amazing about grace?”

As I got older, my intent to make good decisions increased, but so did the resistance. I found myself making more mistakes than I want to admit. Each time I’d tell myself “I’ll never do that again”, circumstances would inevitably lead me to another opportunity to recover, but not without the risk of failure and knowing that I couldn’t do it on my own. That’s when I discovered the meaning of that beautiful hymn. “Twas Grace that taught my heart to fear, and Grace , my fears relieved. How precious did that Grace appear, the hour I first believed”. 

Grace happened when I stopped thinking I could do it all by myself. When I was too tired to take another step on my own and I let God pick me up and carry me. When I finally acknowledged that I am nothing without Him. I couldn’t earn it and I would never know how amazing it was until I humbled myself, asked and received.

I know I will still make mistakes, because I am human. I must daily deny myself (Luke 9:23) But it is grace that makes beauty from my ashes. It erases the slate so I don’t have to look back at my failure, but instead I can look forward at redemption and the hope of one day being made perfect. 

Grace IS Amazing! 

Stepping Out

The calling of the Lord has never been a loud shout in my life. It's always been a gentle and quiet whisper that requires me to muffle all the loud moving parts inside my own head in order to hear Him speak. Even when I'm still long enough to listen for His voice, I find myself straining, "Is that you, Lord? Please, would you speak just a little bit louder, so I can be clear that it is you and what you are saying?"
I was in my 20's when I discovered I had a genetic hearing loss and quickly found myself in and out of the operating room trying correct this rapid loss. With the help of today's wonderful technology and the hands of a surgeon at the House Clinic, I was able to hear much better & prevent any further loss. However, I still had to rely on hearing aids at the early age of 25 to help with clarity from irreparable nerve damage and throw out any insecurities I had about wearing them.
I am almost 43 now and quite used to them. But for the last 20 years, I still find myself studying the lips of people talking so I won't miss anything with my imperfect ears. I often ask those around me "Can you please speak a little louder or clearer?" There are also times I feel like not listening at all, because it can be somewhat tiresome. But those who know me and love me have a great deal of patience and acceptance (my wonderful husband, Aaron and my beautiful daughters) and for that, I am thankful.
Once, I was in line at Ross talking to the gal at the register and I missed something she said and my daughter, Elle speaks out uninhibitedly, "my mom is deaf". I could tell by the gal's expression that she was unsure of the validity of Elle's remark and responded with humor, "so am I, sometimes". To that Elle quickly blurts out "no really, she's deaf... look at her ears!" Clearly, she has no shame or embarrassment. It's a simple fact about her mom that she accepts.
I have learned to feel the same way and I am not ashamed. I have also learned that it cannot be an excuse that keeps me from listening. I have to focus and look at people. I have to tune out other noises and concentrate on the speaker. I cannot say "I can't hear, therefore I won't try to listen".
I see the Lord working in my spiritual life in this same way. He desires to talk to me and all too often, I doubt my ability to discern His voice, so I say "I can't hear you, Lord" or "please speak louder". Even further, sometimes I simply give up trying to listen. Thankfully, He never gives up on me. He calls me to step towards Him, not Him towards me. For me to listen intently, not ask Him to get louder. And just like Jesus called Peter out of the boat and into the water (Matt 14:29), He's calling me. He wants me to stay focused on Him, tune out the waves of doubt and noise around me and step out in faith knowing that He will hold me up.  And to read His word in the same way that I would read lips, as to not miss a thing!
So, here I go. "Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening" (I Sam 3:10). I'm stepping out and it is my deep desire to be used in such a way that brings glory to God, encouragement to you and a new faith to "walk on water".
May God bless you.